Family Management DWMA Style!
by SchrodingersMonster
Summary: Ever taken that class where you get that annoying fake baby that you have to take care of? Well, it's coming to the DWMA! Watch as the gang each try to handle it their own way. Lots of silly moments, fluff, and maybe a little romance? XD SoulxMaka, KidxLiz, TsuxStar, and maybe some CronaxPatty. Enjoy C: rated T to be safe. ongoing series C:
1. Chapter 1

**This came to me when I was thinking about my classes for next year. Lold at all the funny things that would happen if the SE gang had to take Family Managment. Please R&R if you want more C: enjoy!**

**OoOoOo**

It was the most dreaded two weeks in the year at the Death Weapons and Meister's Academy.

Family Management.

Each year, classes would be halted for two weeks to educate the students on all the things that were thought to be necesary about health and families. And each week was worst than the last. For example, in the past year, they were made to put condoms on bananas and taught about genital diseases, much to everyone's extreme displeasure. Even Stein, who was a scientist and a lover of awkward situations, was disgusted. But by law, it had to be done.

Maka wondered what disturbing things would await at her at the DWMA today as she made breakfast for herself and Soul. Throwing the pancakes onto two plates and putting out the syrup and butter, she walked to Soul's bedroom door and banged her fist on it.

"Are you up yet?" She yelled. No answer. Annoyed, the blonde yanked the door open and glanced around. Sure enough, there was her partner, his ivory hair sticking out in tufts as he snored. Maka snorted and marched over to him, shaking his shoulder roughly.

"Get up," she demanded, "We can't be late for class today or Stein will have our heads for missing 'Family Management.'" Soul opened one crimson eye blearily and stared at her before shutting it again and rolling over, muttering something about how 'Family Management is so uncool." Fed up, Maka raised a dictionary over her head.

"Maka..." Instantly, Soul bolted out of the bed faster than humanly possible and scrambled to the table. Grinning, Maka set the book back on the desk she found it on and followed him out, scarfing down her food quickly and urging her weapon to do the same. To her dismay, when they finally left the apartment, they were ten minutes late.

"Maka Albarn and Soul Eater, how nice of you to finally join us." Stein said dryly when they walked into class.

"Sorry, sir." Maka replied while Soul just yawned and looked bored.

"Whatever, just go sit down. We're about to start." Nodding, the partners took their place next to BlackStar and Tsubaki. Clearly, they were not the only ones dreading the lesson because Tsubaki was already sweat dropping as BlackStar went on about last years horrific lessons.

"Hahaha! Herpes! Hahaha!" Patty laughed as Liz desperately shushed her. Kid just looked bored.

At that moment, Sid walked into the classroom, going to stand next to Professor Stein.

"When I was alive, I was not the kind of man who was late," he paused, "But alas, coffee was calling me."

"Right. Well, now that we're all here, we can start." Stein said, waiting until he had the entire class' attention. When everyone was looking at him, he continued, "As you all know, last year, we covered genital diseases." A collective groan rose from the class and Tsubaki turned green.

"Ahem. Thankfully, this year we will _not _be doing that. Instead, we will be learning about babies."

"Babies are so uncool." Soul muttered as he put his head down on the desk, already bored.

"Shhh, I'm trying to listen!" Maka said, glaring at him before turning her attention once again to the front. Soul merely snorted and rolled his eyes.

"...Will each be assigned a fake baby that you will have to take with you everywhere." Sid was saying, holding a clipboard in his blue hand.

"Yes, and we'll know if you don't." Stein grinned widely, causing several students to shiver or grimace in fear of the mad scientist. "Everyone will stay in their current partnerships for the project, since you already live together, work well, and... uh... let's just say there's a good chance that this could happen for real." Maka turned red, sneaking a sideways glance at her weapon who appeared to be asleep, judging from the drool and the quiet snores emitting from him.

"If you have two partners, like Kid or Kilik, one will stay, and one will be paired up with another 'extra'. So, when we call your name, please come down to collect your fake baby and the necessary supplies. Oh, and did I mention this counts for 15 percent of your overall grade in my class this year?" With another collective moan from the class, Sid started calling out partners to go and get their robotic child.

"YAHOO!" shouted BlackStar as he stood up on the desk. "I'M GONNA BE THE BEST AND MOST GODLY DAD EVER! MY KID IS GONNA BE A HUGE STAR!" Maka turned to look behind her and saw Kid freaking out as per the usual.

"How can I have _one _partner?" He wailed while Liz tried to console him and Patty laughed maniacly. "It's asymmetrical! ASYMMETRICAL GARBAGE IS ALL I AM! I DONT DESERVE TO LIVE!"

The blonde meister sighed. It was going to be a long, long two weeks.

**oOoOo**

**That was the first chapter! Tell me what you thought! Who do you want to see trying to raise a fake child? I have tons of good ideas for this so stay tuned and as always please R&R C: cheers!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Thanks for the stellar reviews C: enjoy!**

**Note: The devices I chose to feed the baby and stuff are probably not realistic but I just made it up sooooo XD **

**oOoOo**

"This is so uncool." Soul complained for the fiftieth time as they walked home. He was gripping their 'child' by the ankle and holding it as far away from him as possible. Maka giggled at her partner. She found it quite funny that he was so weirded out by babies.

"Stop complaining, we have to do it whether we like it or not."

"No shit..." Soul muttered under his breath.

"WHAT did you just say?"

"N-nothing!"

Growling under her breath, Maka unlocked the apartment and dumped her armful of stuff on the counter while Soul carelessly threw the baby on the couch. Stein had given her a bunch of devices and a sheet of paper with the instructions, and given Soul the robotic baby.

"And remember," he'd said while glaring at Soul, "I'll know if you've tampered with it in any way, and it'll be an automatic zero." The professor had explained to the class that he had put fragments of his soul inside each baby, meaning that he could check in on their progress any time he wanted.

The blonde meister was determined not to let that happen. She picked up the sheet of paper and read the instructions for the various things. It seemed that there was a bottle simulator, a diaper changing simulator, a bunch of different clothes, a pacifier, and a baby carrier that strapped on to your chest.

"Wow, that's a lot of shit for a fake baby." Maka jumped at Soul's voice in her ear. She hadn't realized that he had been standing right behind her, reading over her shoulder.

"I guess." She turned to face him. "What are you making for dinner?"

"What? It's your turn!"

"Nuh-uh."

"Yes, it is! Don't be uncool."

At that moment, the baby started to cry. _Loudly_. The sound echoed through the tiny apartment and both of them turned to look at it incrediously.

"Uhh, on second thought, I'll make dinner, you deal with that." Before she could protest, Soul escaped to the kitchen. Sighing, Maka turned back to the demonic, shrieking baby. It was wearing a blue outfit, so she assumed that it was supposed to be a boy. _I wonder if Tsubaki and BlackStar are doing any better?_ She thought.

**oOoOo**

"WHY. WON'T. YOU. WORK?" BlackStar yelled, stabbing the pen-shaped device at the demonic, screaming infant. This had been going on for twenty minutes, and every time Tsubaki offered to help, her partner refused, saying that 'Gods don't need help'. Finally, she got fed up.

"Oh, give it here!" she snapped, frustrated. Surprised, BlackStar looked up before shrugging and handing the baby and the bottle simulator over. Tsubaki turned the device on it's side and played with the dial for a moment before pressing the button on the top and gently putting the other end on her arm. Satisfied, the raven haired girl put the end into the slot between the baby's lips and it immediately quieted down. All the while BlackStar watched curiously.

"What did you do?" He asked, coming around behind her to look closer as she continued to 'feed' the baby. Sighing, she put it down and turned to him.

"You see this little dial right here?" He nodded. "It's a temperature dial. You turn it to the correct temperature for milk for an infant and test it against your arm just like you would with real milk. If it's too hot or too cold, the robot will keep crying. Oh, and it says here that the baby's temperature preferences will change so just leaving it on the same setting won't work." The robot beeped in her arms and they both looked down, momentarily distracted. It's eyes had closed, which according to the instruction sheet, meant it was 'asleep'. Breathing a sigh of relief, Tsubaki placed the baby on the counter and turned away from it.

"Do you understand how it works now?" She asked, her smile back in place now that the stressful moment was over.

"Yeah, I think so. Can you show me how the others work too? After all, a God like me has to be prepared!" BlackStar grinned widely. Tsubaki laughed and nodded, picking up the baby carrier with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"I'll teach you how to put this on, come here." She stalked towards him as he backed up, a nervous look coming into his eyes.

"U-uhh... I'd rather not Tsubaki... It's not Godly enough..." BlackStar turned tail and ran, jumping over the couch and scampering into the kitchen with Tsubaki on his heels. She tackled him to the ground and sat on his stomach, both of them laughing breathlessly.

"C'mon, BlackStar, a real man doesn't run from a challenge." She grinned and playfully poked him in the chest. "Don't tell me the guy who's gonna surpass God is _scared_?"

"As if!" He yelled. "Just gimme the damn thing! I'll show you!" Giggling, Tsubaki pulled him up off the floor and handed him the contraption before shoving him gently towards his bedroom door.

She stared after him for a moment, her thoughts drifting. _BlackStar would make a really good dad. At times he can be reckless and even rude, but he's really protective and when he has a goal, he does everything he can to acheive it_. Then she blushed, thinking that those thoughts were really not appropriate. After all, they were just friends. And partners. And roommates... Her blush deepened as she turned back to the little robot in the pink onesie and toque.

Moments later, her partner burst into the kitchen, grinning proudly with his hands on his hips. Tsubaki's mouth dropped open, surprised. He had actually managed to put it on correctly.

"W-wow, BlackStar, good job." She smiled.

"HAHAHA! AS IF A GOD LIKE ME COULD EVER FAIL SUCH AN EASY CHALLENGE!" He yelled, pumping his fist in the air.

"Shhh you'll wake the baby!" Tsubaki desperately hushed him just as the sound of infant wailing rang through the apartment.

Too late.

"Oops." BlackStar said, grabbing the baby and ahoving it into the carrier unceremoniously. He looked ridiculous with huge steel-toed boots, blue hair, and a pink-clad, screaming baby strapped to his chest and Tsubaki couldn't help but feel her heart swell a little at her meister who was trying so hard. "I'm gonna go for a run to keep up my Godly strength and endurance, you make dinner, kay?" He turned for the door.

"Wait." He stopped, turning back to look at her. "You're gonna go jogging... with that attached to you?" Tsubaki asked, trying not to laugh.

"Well, yeah! Then you can make dinner in peace, and I can exercise, and this thing might stop crying. It'll all be fine Tsubaki don't worry a big man like me can handle anything!" And with that he was out the door, leaving a very confused but also very grateful Tsubaki to head for the kitchen.

**oOoOo**

"Hahaha! Giraffes!" Patty laughed as the baby screamed incessantly. "This is so fun!"

Crona put his head in his hands, whimpering. "I can't deal with this, I'm not ready to be a father..." Ragnarok popped out of his back at that moment.

"Just let me eat the damn thing already! It's not going to shut up so just give it here!" He snarled, trying to grab the robot out of Patty's hands. At this, her face turned demonic and she glared at Ragnarok.

"Do. Not. Touch. Him." she growled lividly, towering over Ragnarok as the demon sword cowered in fear. "You got me, you little punk?"

"Yeah, yeah. Jeez, don't get your panties in a twist." He snapped back.

"Yay!" The angry Thompson sister smiled angelicly and turned back to the fake infant as Crona moaned and wished he had a dark corner to escape to.

**oOoOo**

**Hope you liked! Please R&R tell me what you want to see and all that C: cheers!**


	3. Chapter 3

**Delicious robotic babies :B**

**oOoOo**

Maka and Soul collapsed on the couch, exhausted. They had finally managed to get Akuma, as they called him, to go to sleep. It had taken three feedings, two diaper changes, and forty five minutes of holding him to get him to finally shut his robotic eyes. Oh, and they also had to make dinner and finish their homework.

Maka groaned as she stretched out, putting her head on Soul's stomach as he leant back. It was usually their I-just-got-back-from-a-hard-mission-and-I'm-exhausted pose, but today it was their why-in-the-name-of-fuck-does-family-management-exist pose.

"Babies are the most uncool thing ever." Soul moaned, rubbing a hand over his face wearily.

"That was hell." Maka agreed. "At least it's only two weeks though. If it were for real it would be full time."

The demon scythe yawned and gently shoved Maka off as he stood up. "I'm wiped, I'm going to bed." He trudged off to his room, and the blonde heaved herself up off the couch to do the same. She struggled to keep her eyes open as she pulled her pyjamas on, and gratefully collapsed into the warm embrace of her bed in the darkness. _Finally_, she thought,_ I can get some rest._

And that's when the high, shrieking wail of a baby crying started.

Oh hell no. No way this was happening right now. Soul Eater rolled over and clutched his pillow around his ears, trying to ward off the demonic screams.

"Maka!" he yelled. "It's your turn!"

"No way! You get it!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"Not a chance!"

"DO I HAVE TO MAKA CHOP YOU?"

"Fine, fine I'm doing it!" Soul heaved himself back out of bed and dragged himself into the kitchen. Blearily he tried the bottle simulator, the diaper changing simulator, and he rocked the damn thing for twenty minutes. it just wouldn't stop crying. He grabbed the instruction sheet off the counter and scanned it quickly.

_... If your fake infant continues to cry after you've tried everything, you're just going to have to deal with it. Sometimes babies just cry because they can. Good luck!_

Soul groaned as he threw the useless piece of paper back on the counter. _What kind of person just cries randomly?_ He thought as he turned the TV on quietly, all the while rocking Akuma absentmindedly. It stopped crying but was still awake, and anytime Soul stopped rocking it, it would start to scream again. After about an hour of this, Maka plopped down next to Soul on the couch.

"You should sleep." He said, not looking at her.

"Nah," she replied, "Partners always stick together. Pass the little demon here."

**oOoOo**

"Kid, let me have him!" Liz screamed as she tried to yank the robot baby from her partner.

"No!" He yelled back, darting out of the demon gun's grasp. "It's too asymmetrical! It must be fixed!" Liz rolled her eyes as she followed him.

"Kid, seriously, Stein will dissect us if we damage the damn thing." Once again she lunged for it.

"I DON'T CARE! I HAVE TO FIX IT! ONE BLUE EYE AND ONE GREEN IS UNACCEPTABLE!"

"AND WHAT IF IT WAS OUR REAL BABY? WOULD YOU HAVE TO 'FIX IT' THEN?"

Silence shot through the Gallows Mansion as Liz clapped a hand over her mouth, astounded that she'd been so bold. Kid looked thoughtfully down at the fake infant, rubbing his thumb over it's cheek.

"No, of course not." He said, frowning. "I would never do that. You know that, Liz."

"Then," She replied, carefully yanking it out of his hands, "_give _it here." The Shinigami let Liz take the stupid thing, watching as she carefully rocked it and gave it the bottle simulator. And for one brief second, he imagined a real baby in her arms, one with her dark blonde hair and his flashing gold eyes, giggling and cooing as babies do. He swallowed thickly and shook the image from his mind.

"I have to go... organize things."

**oOoOo**

**Uber short but I wanted to do a quick update before I went to bed C: more tomorrow so please r&R if you liked so I know i should continue C: cheers!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**I'm sorry I haven't uploaded in so long! My power cord for my laptop broke and its 80 bucks for a new one so I haven't bought one :c I'm using my friends computer right now so until I get a new cord my updates are not gonna be nearly as frequent. Sorry! But anyways onwards to the story :D**

**Disclaimer: I disclaim this. **

**oOoOo**

Maka and Soul trudged up the stairs of the DWMA wearily, their feet dragging on every step. Akuma had kept them up until four last night, his robotic eyes finally shutting after six hours of incessant crying. The pair had collapsed in bed, immediately dropping off into an exhausted slumber that was way too short.

Maka glanced over her shoulder at Soul. A long string of drool trailed out of his mouth, and his normally droopy eyes were slits as he struggled to keep them open. He had the demonic robot child strapped to his chest in the light blue baby carrier, which normally Maka would have found hilarious. But today all she could do was rub her eyes in exhaustion. The blonde meister knew she probably looked no better, as she only had a few minutes to get ready that morning because Akuma was screaming.

As they reached the top of the stairs and looked out over the courtyard of the Academy, both noticed something odd. The front entrance was completely silent. Usually, it was crowded with weapons and meisters before class started, standing around chatting about missions, or battling. But this morning, the sun was the only one staring back at them. No Blackstar screaming about his Godliness. No Kid having a panic attack on the ground, nothing. Just an eerie, empty silence.

"That's weird." Maka said, her eyes scanning the courtyard cautiously. "Where is everyone?"

Soul walked past her, muttering, "I'm too tired to care, let's just get to class." She stared after the albino for a moment, the words taking longer than normal to process in her sluggish mind, then shrugged and followed him. They crossed into the school quickly, eager to get to class and see what was going on.

Entering the classroom, it was easy to see why no one was in the courtyard. Every other student in the room looked just as exhausted as Maka and Soul felt, black bags under most of their eyes, heads slumped on the desk, pure fatigue written all over them. Even BlackStar, who was normally the most boisterous of them all, was holding his pink clad baby away from him with a look of terror as it screamed. Tsubaki, who normally would have been the first to jump to her partner's rescue, was sleeping, soft snores emitting from her. The only exception was Patty, who was her normal self, giggling and throwing her 'infant' up and down in the air and laughing while Crona tried to take it from her and Ragnarok hit him.

"You're late." Meister and weapon looked over at Stein, who was grinning gleefully at the obvious distress of his students.

"Sorry, professor, I-"

"No excuses, just sit down so we can start." He gestured them forwards and they tediously took their seats just as Sid walked in.

"Alright, class, listen up. This is only the second day of Hell, so get used to how you feel right now, because it's far from over." Stein said, rolling on his chair over to the blackboard and starting to write down notes.

"If your infant starts to cry, you may leave the room to deal with it. Other than that, we expect everyone to be acting as if this were another normal day." Sid grinned; he as well delighted in seeing the normally energetic teens so quiet and passive. "Now, get out your notebooks and copy down Professor Stein's notes on lactating. Oh, and anyone who falls asleep will get 5% taken off their mark."

Maka frowned in determination. She wouldn't let one stupid project get the best of her. Unfortunately, her mark was tied to Soul's, who was renowned for falling asleep in class in a normal situation. It was going to be a long and frustrating day, she could tell already.

**oOoOo**

"HAHAHA! That was so fun! I made it touch the roof hehe~" Patty laughed maniacally as she exited the classroom, Crona being dragged behind her. He was beyond exhausted. Not only did he have to take care of a robotic demon baby, but he also had to deal with Patty's simultaneously exuberant and insane attitude. Oh, and let's not forget the huge, black, demon that came out of his back. Groaning, the pinkette struggled to keep up with his partner.

"H-hey, Patty, can you slow down a bit?" He pleaded. The blonde weapon just laughed and kept skipping, swinging the baby up and down as she went. At this moment, Ragnarok decided to pop out.

"Oh, just let the bitch go." He snarled, pulling Crona's hair. "The farther away from us she is, the less time we have to spend with that stupid robotic bastard."

Crona didn't even have the energy to tell his partner to stop pulling his hair or not to call Patty a bitch. Besides, Ragnarok was in a terrible mood from being kept up all night. The Demon Sword had nicknamed the infant Mesu **(A\N bitch in Japanese XD) **after it had cried for three straight hours.

Suddenly, Patty turned back to Crona, her skipping coming to a halt as she waited for the swordsman to catch up. Grinning widely, she took his hand and continued to drag him down the street, despite his protests and the blush that rose to his cheeks.

"Oh, calm down." Ragnarok snapped, feeling his blood rush to Crona's face, as it was a part of him. "It's not like she gave you head or anything. God, you're a desperate little bastard." He began to pummel his meister's head with his fists, causing the pinkette to cry out in pain. Hearing this, Patty turned around again. But this time, she turned slowly, her grip on her temporary partner's hand tightening until Crona thought she was going to crush it permanently. The demon gun glared daggers at Ragnarok, her face stony as she drew closer to him.

"Listen up, you snivelling, evil little bastard. We're _all_ tired. We were _all_ kept up last night by Mesu. So shut your creepy, demonic, _nasty_ mouth or I'll shut it for you. You got that, you little fucker?" Patty growled lividly. Ragnarok, terrified, nodded and quickly disappeared back inside of Crona. Immediately, the girl's face grew sunny again.

"Let's go get ice cream, kay?~" Patty cheered before continuing on her way.

Crona thought he might pass out from all the mood swings and tension in the air. He timidly held Patty's hand tighter and hurried to keep up with her.

**oOoOo**

Meanwhile, the rest of the gang were out in the courtyard, talking. Soul, Kid, and BlackStar were sitting on the front steps, Kid and Soul mocking BlackStar's pink baby carrier, while he argued that "only a real man has the balls to wear one in public." The girls, minus Patty, were standing a ways away, chatting and giggling.

"…And then," Tsubaki laughed, "he came back, all sweaty and gross, and told me that an old lady tried to take Cho from him because she thought that she was real and that BlackStar was abusing her!" Maka and Liz dissolved into laughter, clutching each other and wiping tears from their eyes. The trio glanced over at their partners, who were now violently wrestling Kid into _his_ pink baby carrier, and a slightly more sombre atmosphere descended over them.

"Despite all that, they're not doing as bad as I thought they would." Maka said, her eyes burning into Soul's back thoughtfully. Her mind drifted back to the night before, how she'd eventually fallen asleep and instead of waking her up, her partner had taken Akuma from her and let her sleep. A smile flitted onto her face.

Liz hummed her agreement, thinking of the weird tension that had existed between herself and Kid after her outburst. He was of the utmost carefulness with the robotic baby after that, making sure everything was done perfectly. It almost felt like he was trying to prove something to the demon gun, almost as if it were… real.

Thoughts of BlackStar's antics filled Tsubaki's head as her laughter subsided. He had somehow managed to keep her from going insane last night, his jokes and stunts giving her a distraction from the hell that was a robotic infant. He had also learnt his lesson about shouting when Cho, as they'd called her, was asleep, instead deciding to rock her quietly. It showed a side of him that most people didn't get to see, and it brought a dark blush to the weapon's cheeks.

_He really would make a great father_, the three thought simultaneously.

**oOoOo**

Spirit stared down into the courtyard at his daughter, leaning against the railing of the balcony as he did so. She was laughing with that idiotic partner of hers, the white haired, slouchy, Soul. The Death Scythe resisted grinding his teeth in annoyance, unhappy that the shark toothed boy was making his daughter happy. Suddenly Maka turned around, holding something in her arms, something that looked suspiciously like… Spirit squinted, then felt his jaw drop. His Maka, his precious little girl, was holding a _baby_. A real, live baby! It was screaming and everything! The red haired scythe felt panic setting in as he mind babbled at him.

_How could I let this happen? She's so young, and inexperienced, and I didn't even know she was pregnant! How could I not notice something like that, I'm such a bad father, no wonder Kami left me and my daughter hates me! Oh, Death, what will lord death think. Ohnoohnoohno…._

Then, abruptly, the answer came to him. _This was all Soul's fault. He was corrupting my precious Maka, Hell, maybe he even forced her into it! _Growling lividly, Spirit stormed off to yell at the albino, and to beg his daughter to put the damn thing up for adoption, crying all the way.

**oOoOo**

**Whew! Hope you liked. I take requests for stories C: please R&R if you want me to continue XD feed a starving author!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Changed my pen name, sorry if that confused anyone XD**

**A lot of people have been asking how Spirit could have not noticed that its family management week. Guys… It's Spirit. Nuff said XD**

**Someone told me I sucked yesterday. LOL. They didn't give a reason why. Just, you suck. Thanks, random person.**

**NOTE: This chapter is dedicated to three people; XSeeYouAtYourDoomX because he/she always reviews my chapter and it makes me feel special XD**

**Jennasweet1998 because her review was written with perfect grammar and spelling and it was more than just 'good story' NOT THAT I DON'T LOVE THOSE TOO C:**

**DaNarwhal because she gave me a cookie XD **

**I know, I'm ridiculously. But anyways, I digress.**

**Disclaimer: I disclaim this x3**

**oOoOo**

Soul pulled Maka down next to him as he flopped onto the couch, exhausted. _Thank God it's the weekend_, he thought, placing Akuma on the ground carefully before groaning and closing his eyes, head leant over the back of the couch while he struggled to remain conscious. The week had been brutal. Each day the partners were more tired than the last, which in turn made the professors more gleeful, causing them to increase their work load. Soul couldn't take it much longer. Family Management was the _epitome_ of uncool.

Maka, too, was reaching her limit. The blonde meister already had a short fuse, and it seemed that the late hours and repetitive activities they had been put through lately were really taking a toll. She would snap at the drop of a hat, biting words out rudely even to Crona, who she was normally quite delicate with. But, they were dealing as best they could.

Wordlessly, Soul grabbed Maka's hand and squeezed it tightly. Telling her, _I'm here, we'll get through this, just like we always do_. Silently, she squeezed back, _I know_. The absence of noise was deafening to ears that had been shattered by a baby's wails for the past week. It was so peaceful. Maka could almost-

Bang! The door slammed open, revealing a very distraught and angry Spirit, his tie askew, breathing hard. Soul moaned in annoyance and Maka blinked in surprise.

"Dad?" She asked, confused. "What're you-"

"Maka," Spirit said, eyes blazing, "You know Papa loves you very much, but this is not okay."

Soul rolled his eyes, "What the hell are you on about, old man?" The Death Scythe's head snapped around to look at Soul, and he started towards the albino lividly. The younger Scythe's hands came up in defense.

"Hey, hey, hey!" He yelled, panicked. "Don't be uncool, dude. I didn't do anything."

"Like hell you didn't!" The redhead shouted, pointing an accusing finger in Soul's face. "You gave Maka that… that _thing_. This is entirely your fault!" He stood in the middle of the living room, chest heaving. Maka was quite confused, and frustrated, and tired. In short, she'd had enough. Standing up, she faced her dad, glaring into his eyes. Azure met jade as they silently battled for dominance.

"Seriously, Papa, I'll Maka Chop you straight to hell if you don't tell me what you're on about right now!" She huffed, raising a dictionary she pulled from God knows where over her head threateningly. Instantly, Spirit backed down, looking frightened.

"Now now, Maka, don't do anything you would regret, sweetie," Spirit muttered pleadingly. Soul snorted derisively from behind Maka.

"As if she would regret _that_." He rolled his crimson eyes.

"YOU JUST SHUT UP YOU LITTLE PUNK NO ONE ASKED YOUR SORRY ASS JUST TAKE YOUR DAMN IMPREGNATING SELF AND PISS OFF!" Spirit raged. Now Maka was really confused. Impregnating? What? Suddenly, her forest green eyes widened and she got it. Then she started to laugh. Both Spirit and Soul glanced at her, thinking she must have lost her damn mind.

"Papa… seriously…" She giggled, wiping tears from her eyes, "It's fake…" Understanding clicking into Soul's mind, he turned to gape at the Death Scythe.

"Whoa, whoa. Actually?!" He groaned, annoyed, "You _actually_ thought I would get Maka pregnant and you wouldn't notice? Oh, Death, you _are_ as dumb as you look." Spirit's head jerked back and forth between the weapon and meister as he tried to understand.

"You mean… You mean it wasn't real?" He managed to choke out, looking stricken. Maka bit back another laugh.

"No, Papa, of course it isn't." She bent and picked up Akuma by the leg, holding the fake robot baby up so Spirit could see. "It's part of a Family Management assignment. It's just a robot." Cautiously, Spirit poked it, looking immensely relieved when it didn't spring to life or start screaming.

"Well, now that that's solved, I'll be going." He headed towards the door, turning back to say, "And remember, Maka, Papa loves you~!" Before slamming the door shut.

As if on cue, Akuma started to scream.

"Fuck." Soul moaned, putting his face in his hands.

_Yeah_, Maka agreed silently as she went to get the bottle simulator. _Fuck_.

**oOoOo**

"I can't do this anymore!" Liz screamed, frustrated. She threw Pip violently across the room and covered her face with her hands, tears leaking from the corners of her eyes. Although Kid was an amazing and talented partner, and he had saved her and her sister's lives, sometimes he could be a real pain in the ass to handle on top of a baby.

_Damn_, Liz thought as she shuddered along with her tears, _I never thought _I_ would be the one to crack under the pressure, but this is insane_. Not only did she have to do everything the other partners did, she also had to deal with the normal OCD bullshit from the young Shinigami she shared a house with. Sometimes, she got a little overwhelmed. Like now. As if trying to spite her, the demonic robot infant started to scream loudly, and Liz had to grit her teeth through her tears so she didn't blast the stupid thing into a thousand pieces.

Kid watched all of this unfold with calculating eyes. He knew that Liz was extremely overwhelmed at the moment, what with the Family Management thing, himself being himself, and Patty being away from home and her sister. It was partially his fault, he supposed, so he should attempt to fix it. Silently, the Shinigami walked behind Liz and put his hands on her almost-bare shoulders, rubbing them soothingly.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, meaning it. "I'm sorry we have to do this. I'm sorry you can't see your sister as often as you'd like. I'm sorry I'm so fucked up." Gradually, the older Thompson sister unclenched, relaxing into her meister's touch and letting out a pent-up sigh.

"It's not your fault." She murmured back. "You can't help who you are, and I should be able to handle myself, it's just…" She stopped, shaking her head. Carrying on would not get her anywhere. Kid's fingers hesitated, stopping undoing the tense knots in her back.

"No, what were you going to say?" He questioned.

"Forget it."

"Liz."

"Kid."

"Don't you trust me?"

At this, the Demon Gun started to crumble, the wall she put up in her heart cracking at his persistentcy. Finally, finally, she dropped her head forward and gave in.

"I'm just so tired, Kid." Immediately, the boy's slender digits moved up her neck, releasing tension she hadn't even known was there. She couldn't hold back a faint moan as he continued, feeling herself blush at her brazenness.

"Liz, Liz, Liz." Kid mumbled hoarsely, his fingers stopping but not leaving her neck. Instead, they almost seemed to caress it. "All you need to do is tell me. Just let me in, Elizabeth. Let me heal you."

Boom. Down went the wall, crumbling to the ground with all of her resistance and hesitance. Without a word, she turned around, pressing her lips to Kid's. His mouth moved with hers gently, slowly, _lovingly_. Growling, Liz knotted her fingers into her meister's hair and tugged, signaling to him that she wasn't in the mood for gentle. Pulling back, he chuckled and tucked a strand of ashen blonde hair behind the weapon's ear.

"As much as I'd like to continue with… that," He said, grinning, "We do have some rather important things to get back to." He motioned to Pip, who was still laying on the floor, screaming. Sighing, Liz stepped away from Kid and went to pick up the robotic infant. She felt a lot calmer and more able to deal with things after that little episode. Maybe it was Kid's massage, or… maybe it was just the fact that he truly, deeply, _cared_. Wordlessly, she glanced over at her meister. He smiled back at her, and her heart jumped a little in her chest. At that moment, she didn't care what it was, Liz was just glad she had it.

**oOoOo**

**I cant believe this took me two freakin hours! I hope I did alright with the KidxLiz scene, let me know what you thought of this chapter! C: theres probably only two or three chapters left in this series. Sad, I know. Let me know what you wanna see!**

**Requests for other stories always welcome C: **

**And, as always, feed a starving author, R&R XD**

**Cheers!**


	6. Update!

I am so, so sorry.

I know Ive been away for EONS but i have reasons!

1. My computer was broken for two months

2. A week after we fixed it, the internet got fucked up

3. School just started again

4. Im a crappy person

Soooooo, just an update for this story, yes i WILL be finishing it. There will most likely be one or two more chapters and a little epilogue/romantic little thing. I have some ideas :)

So anyways, yeah, I'm really sorry, I'm a terrible person, you all hate me, I dont deserve any cookies or cake, etc. I know.

Anyone go to the metallica concert this summer? It was awesome. Just saying.

Update probably tonight or tomorrow, I promise xx


	7. Chapter 6

**Sooooo, I was literally just sitting down to write this, when my stepdad broke the internet AGAIN :S sorry!**

**Enjoy**

**oOoOo **

As Maka wandered up the stairs of the DWMA, Soul huffing and puffing as he carried all the baby stuff behind her, she felt something. Something was different. Eyes as keen as a hawk's scanned the courtyard until she spotted it. Not much of a difference, but still.

Standing with Blackstar and Patty were Kid and Liz. And they were holding hands. Maka squealed a little inside when she saw it. _Well obviously it was gonna happen sometime_, she thought to herself. _But still. I'm happy for them. Now if only that would happen to me..._

She glanced back at Soul again. Spiky ivory hair, hungry ruby eyes, sharp canine teeth, and that elusive 'cool' air. Maka loved him. She really, really did. More than she ever thought she could love a man. But he was so not into her...

Soul stared at the back of her head, at that beautiful honey colored hair that shone like gold. He could never make the words work when there was an opportunity. Instead of saying 'I love you' it would come out 'stupid bookworm' and he'd fuck it all up. Besides, she was so not into him...

**oOoOo**

'Why can't you just be serious?!' Tsubaki screamed, throwing her hands up as BlackStar once again hucked Cho across the room at a giant bullseye he had drawn on the wall.

The blue haired meister laughed loudly. "C'mon, Tsubaki, it's fun! Chill out, or you'll never be as big of a star as me!" And he continued to play his stupid game.

Tsubaki was about ready to rip her hair out. She was normally extremely hard to aggravate, but things changed when she had to deal with two children instead of just the normal one. She was sleep deprieved, exhausted, and hungry. And what was her so called partner doing? Playing idiotic games, because that's all he knew how to do. That's all he was good at. The weapon growled under her breath.

_I've had enough._

Without a word, Tsubaki grabbed her coat and left the apartment, slamming the door shut on her way out. She didn't know where she was going, but she had to get away.

**oOoOo**

Stein hummed under his breath as he worked, a melancholy, almost creepy tune that vaguely represented something out of a 1950's horror movie. He hated grading papers, especially when the subject was anything other than biology or dissection. Speaking of, they hadn't done a dissection in so long...

The mad doctor frowned. Why hadn't they done a dissection? His fist slammed down on the table as the answer came to him. It was that damn Family Management crap. What a waste of time. If the students wanted to know what it was like to raise a baby, then they should just have one, instead of taking up his precious time.

On the other hand, it was pretty fun to mess with them...

His thoughts were interrupted by a loud throat clearing in the doorway. Stein looked up, brushing some silver locks out of his way to properly see who was bothering him now. Leaning against the doorjamb stood Sid, his large blue face grinning down at the meister.

"May I help you?" Stein drawled, already bored. The zombie grinned wider and invited himself in.

"Nah, I was just coming to check up on you. That's the kind of man I was, always checking up on my friends, y'know?"

Stein put down his pen carefully before giving Sid the full effect of his glare. "I would hardly assume as much as to call us friends. But nevertheless, I am fine. You needn't worry."

Sid stared at him for a second, then quickly headed for the door. "Uhh... right. Well, I'll just be going then." He stopped. "Oh, by the way, have any of the kids figured it out yet?"

The doctor grinned maliciously. "Nope. They have yet to realize that I can't actually put my soul into their robotic infants."

**oOoOo**

"Hello?"

"HAVE YOU SEEN TSUBAKI?!"

"Oww, man, don't yell-"

"I CANT FIND HER AND ITS SUPER IMPORTANT AND I THINK I FUCKED IT UP BIG TIME HOW CAN I EVER BE THE STAR NOW SOUL?!"

"Dude, seriously, my eardrum is shattering, yelling is so uncool..."

"**HELP ME**!"

"All right, all right, calm down. What did you do now?"

"I WAS BEING STUPID! PLEASE, HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEE."

"You need to make it up to her. Show her you care. Get her flowers or some shit, I dunno, I don't-"

"K THANKS BYE!"

*click*

**oOoOo**

**Dun dun dunnnnnnnnnn! **

**Will Soul and Maka ever admit their feelings for each other? Will Tsubaki be found? WILL STEIN EVER STOP BEING A SADISTIC BASTARD?!**

**The last chap will probably two parts plus an epilogue. Hope you enjoyed! Leave a review C: **

**Also, to any and all TsuStar fans, check out HanaSuta and The Sun Kissed The Moon! They dont get enough love :S**

**Love ya!**


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